365 Questions--February 15

What qualities do you value in a romantic partner

In a previous blog, I was asked what are important factors of a relationship, or something of that nature. Keep all of those things in mind when reading that. Those things are definitely important to me in a partner, but there are some things outside of that I also consider.

For example, I value effort. If I see you making a genuine attempt to make something happen. I'm a busy woman, and if you're a busy man and still try to do something, calling, texting, just some kind of effort. He could have a million and one things to do, but if he makes just a little bit a time for me that says a lot. You took time out of your day to think about me enough to do something. 

Another thing I value is thoughtfulness. To some people, money is everything and don't get me wrong, money is important to some extent. However, money doesn't buy the right kind of gift. I remember being 16 and I was dating a dope boy. He always tried to buy me stuff, like clothes and bags, but I didn't really care about that. But on my 17th birthday 2 things. One, he collaborated with my family to throw me and my cousin a surprise party. Two, he made me a journal full of childhood pictures of him. Now from the outside looking in, it may seem a little narcissistic, but it wasn't. I love pictures so I was really excited about it, and I love to write so the gift was perfect. The thought it took to put into it meant more to me than anything money could buy. 

Speaking of money...It is not a requirement for me to have a man currently with money. Crazy I know. The only reason I say that is because I don't have money so I can't expect somebody to bring something to the table that I don't bring to the table. It's not fair. Instead of requiring money, I require ambition. You can dream all you want and have all the potential in the world, but if you are not actively working towards those dreams what's the point? Those dreams just go to the ceiling. Seeing a man in his element and working towards his goals is extremely attractive to me. 

What do you look for in a mate?

See, I like the person that you are, 
But I'm in love with the person that you have potential to be 
And all your dreams sharing with me 
And your secrets baring with me 
And the flaws, you ain't even got to mention to m

--Wale